Life Coaching, TYC Living

Be Honest with Me

Did you miss me? Be honest. It’s okay if you didn’t even notice I was away. It’s been a few weeks since I lasted posted on Shine TYC. I’ve been consumed by completing the first draft of a project that’s due — and my older son’s wedding and my younger son’s college applications. If I’m honest with myself, the reason I’m writing this post now is probably to avoid working on the project in these last few hours before the deadline.

IF— I’m honest with myself, which, by the way, is not an easy thing to do.

The second principle in my book Stay In Your Lane is to accept yourself so that you can make the changes you want to make in your life. Accepting who you are and how you are takes a healthy dose of honesty. Telling yourself the truth and hearing it is not intuitive to us as humans. After all Jeremiah 17:9 says, “The human heart is the most deceitful of all things, and desperately wicked. Who really knows how bad it is?” Add that to the fact that our human nature is always at odds with our spiritual desire to do “good” and…well…you can’t trust anybody, not even yourself.

Moving passed the specks in others and dealing the planks in our own eyes can be difficult because we don’t want to admit the truth. From my experience, being honest with “me” is the key that unlocked my personal freedom. It was a strong determining factor in the development of my faith. Let me tell you, once you see yourself clearly, you’ll know just how much you need Jesus. Can I get an Amen?

There is tremendous power in calling out “what is” so that you can sincerely and effectively pray about it. This is why I journal. I take time daily to write “what is” for a few reasons:

  • To remember “what is” when my emotions carry me away to something else
  • To get an accurate assessment of “what is” so I know how to pray effectively
  • To accept “what is” so that I pray sincerely

Getting to truth takes honesty. Duh!

I am not a fan of brutal honesty. I abhor the phrase. I encourage the world to tell the truth in love like Ephesians 4:15 teaches us — especially when telling the truth to ourselves. There’s a fine line, a narrow way, between telling yourself the truth and disrespecting God’s handiwork in creating you. Like most things with faith, it’s not complicated, but it is complex. We must develop the ability to be honest with ourselves about shortcomings and desires, while submitting those things to God to fix what he wants fixed. Remember Paul’s thorn? You’re never going to be perfect and you will always have something to pray about.

On occasion I am still forced to deal with painful memories and residual feelings of the past. Using honesty as a tool, I’m also able to discern what behaviors and decisions are being influenced by that pain. Then, I can redirect and get back ON PURPOSE. You get it? If you let people, pain, or the past dictate how you live, then you’ll never get to a place of authenticity and personal freedom. You’ll miss out on purpose. Let me say it again…

If you let people, pain, or the past dictate how you live, then you’ll never get to a place of authenticity and personal freedom.

Search Your Heart and Line It Up

I’m a Bible nerd who requires a scripture for everything. The way I eat, how much I sleep, how I spend my time —— all have a scripture tied to them. You know why? Because I’ve learned not to trust my feelings. Thanks Jeremiah! However, Psalm 37:4 says God plants his desires into our hearts. Yippee! The practical way to distinguish between what God put in our hearts and our own mess is to align with God’s word and the principles of our faith. We have to check ourselves regularly and be honest about that little four-chambered muscle that makes us want to eat a whole cake, rebuke Brussel spouts and embrace the drama that is reality TV.

Yes! Follow your heart….as your heart follows Christ. Certainly! Trust your gut, but be sure you’ve eaten enough of The Word to guide you.

Be Honest About Your Journey. It’s All Good.

I was pharmacist that became a marketing executive that became a writer. It’s my vocational journey. My life journey is even more…shall we say…colorful. Despite the pain and passion, drive and disappointment that was seeded by my life journey, I am able to accept all of it because…you guessed it…I have a scripture. Romans 8:28 says that “We know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.”

And by “everything” God means… everything, all of it, every last day of your life. So, it’s okay to be honest about your mistakes, your tragedies and your triumphs. The point is that when you trust God to make it all good, you can keep moving forward with hope, courage, and love. You aren’t ashamed and you’re not arrogant. You are honest about yourself, your life, and the contents of your heart. So let’s commit to being honest with ourselves…

Otherwise, you’ll never be honest with anyone else.

*drops mic and exits

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