|Life Coach, Kamryn Adams|
When I was a little girl there was a Saturday morning cartoon called “School House Rock” from which I learned about conjunctions: “and”, “or” and the ubiquitous “BUT”. Conjunctions link two thoughts together to give us a full picture of the scenario. How we feel about ourselves can be directly linked to our use of conjunctions. Which type of conjunction person are you?
Confident: “I can do this AND this.”
Conflicted: “I could do this OR this.”
Cynical: “I can do this BUT not this.”
Recently I realized my “BUT” was getting out of control. I am at a crossroads in my career. I can continue to make the “safe” six-figures from Corporate America using my talent as a global marketer and strategist. I can become credentialed in my passion of helping people and guiding them into a space of love and grace. I could do nothing right now and sit on my “BUT”. Instead of me using “AND” to pursue all the possibilities or the “OR” to consider what best aligns with my life goals, I have landed on my “BUT”. I never realized that my “BUT” could be so cynical and indecisive.
In my executive career I have participated in numerous studies, examinations, and evaluations of my development. I have consistently been deemed: intelligent, fair, influential and DECISIVE. One of my strongest attributes is the ability to process information quickly and make a logical, yet intuitively strong, decision to solve a problem or create an opportunity. So what’s wrong with my “BUT” now?
After careful examination I realized that the older I get the bigger my “BUT” gets. As children we did not know enough to be afraid. As young adults we did not know enough to be overly cautious but, as you get older you come to understand that life can throw you curve balls and unexpected surprises. The older you get the more you realize that most things in life are all about perspective. If we have a positive outlook, positive things flow. If we have a negative outlook, negativity seems to cloud our way. We have full power to get our “BUT” in line with what we want.
So that is where I am now…getting my “BUT” in order. I am making sure that whatever follows my “BUT” is something positive and beneficial to me. For example:
Rather than …”I can do this but NOT THAT”
I choose to think… “I can do this but ALSO THAT.”
Rather than… “It might work but IT WILL BE DIFFICULT.”
I choose to think… “It will be difficult but I CAN DO IT.”
You see, it is all in how your “BUT” thinks. It is okay to use your “BUT” to connect thoughts and to think through all of your options. However you must use your mind and spirit to influence the outcome. Don’t let your “BUT” lead the way. Just free your mind and your “BUT” will follow.